A little white stick 

Today is 5dp3dt, five days since Acorn and chestnut were transferred back in to me. 

For a few days I’ve been really really hungry all the time. Then yesterday I felt sick all day and today I’ve a a dull ache low down in my belly and lower back. I know these ‘symptoms’ are mostly down to the progesterone. But there’s still that hope that I could possibly be feeling something, but I also know it’s way to early to feel anything. 

Today I got myself a little emotional, I felt myself welling upset the thought of 1) having to take a hpt and 2) having to tell everyone it hasn’t worked. I’m already thinking of excuses to give the clinic as to why I didn’t answer my phone or get back to them with the result. I’ve also bought the book it starts with an egg to read to prepare myself better for the next cycle. 

I’m also finding the thought of having to actually take a hpt really daunting, I’ve been having dreams about it almost every night since transfer. Every time I go into a shop I glance at them from a distance hoping no one spots me trying to work out which one to buy, but to also pluck up the courage to pick one up off the shelf and take it to the till. The clinic have given me one. But, after some research I’ve discovered that it’s not actually that sensitive and not recommend to be used until 1 or 2 days after a missed period and my test day is 11dp3dt, or the day of a missed period. I’m sure they must work or they wouldn’t use them. But, I don’t need the added worry of wondering if it’s given an accurate result.

 Who would have thought a little white stick could cause so must anxiety? 


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